This past week I’ve noticed that the women who wear lingerie to their everyday life are often the ones with the most to say, “I think I should wear a sexy lingerie.
So you can imagine my surprise when I was looking through the lingerie section of my local mall the other day. I couldn’t help but notice a very nice black lace lingerie set with a matching bra. The set came with a matching bra, a matching boxy black lace bra, and matching lingerie and stockings. The price tag was $48, and all the pieces were very nicely assembled and all together good quality.
Who does lingerie and stockings look like? The younger, femme-inclusives. And who do they look like? Older, mostly white, and mostly male. In fact, I can think of a whole lot of other people whose lives and bodies and lives and bodies and lives and bodies are just as much at risk from this kind of thinking as mine. It’s a time-honored form of discrimination, and it’s a huge part of our societal problem.
Of course, there’s the other side of the coin, too.
And the other side of the coin is a lot of other women who would never dare wear such a provocative outfit on a regular day, but who would wear such a provocative outfit just to get people’s attention.
I am so not in any way trying to be sexist here, but the fact that some women would even think to wear such a revealing outfit is a lot like giving men a pass when they are doing the same thing. If it’s really important to you that your man/boyfriend/husband/husband/boyfriend/husband/boyfriend/husband/boyfriend/husband/boyfriend/husband doesn’t see you that way, then go for it.
I mean if you really don’t care at all about your man-friendboyfriendhusbandhusbandhusbandboyfriendhusbandboyfriendhusbandboyfriendhusbandboyfriendhusbandboyfriendhusbandboyfriend, then you have no business wearing that lingerie. But if you are going to wear it, then you should be aware that the man you are seeing is not the one you want to see.
I am also going to say that men who wear lingerie like that are not the kind of guy you want to be seen with. Now, what is the problem with wearing lingerie like that? It’s not that they’re bad-looking, but many guys would have the decency to tell you that you look like a whore without it.
There are a number of things that lingerie doesn’t give the female body on its own. One is the illusion of sexual availability. Another is that wearing lingerie gives you a sense of “femininity,” which is a very different thing from “sexuality.” The last is that women who wear lingerie lose a lot of their natural self-confidence.
In some ways, the biggest problem lingerie gives the female body is that it makes it feel like there is something of a gender barrier. Lingerie is like a costume – when a woman is wearing it, she is the one who is the costume. It’s not a comfortable feeling to be the only woman in the room, so women who wear lingerie are often seen as the bitches who have ruined the party.